In June we celebrate the “youth” in the country, with the 16th June being Youth Day. The timing of acknowledging the youth could not be more fortuitous, given the impact of COVID-19.

A lot has been said and written about how adults have been dealing with the effects of COVID-19. This month, however, lets take a moment to reflect on how the pandemic has affected the lives of our youth.

“I’m not tired, I’m angry!” my child roared, much to my surprise. His reaction was far bigger than I had expected. A lot of parents are spending more time at home with their children because of the national lockdown. As we tackle the new roles such as parent and teacher, we have gotten to see the other sides of our children too. Like I did when I saw this very angry side of my usually easy-going son.

The youth are also battling with the National lockdown. So how do you help them through these difficult moments and days?

Here are a few tips as to how to help your children to learn about their feelings and, in so doing, become more understanding about others’ feelings too.

It is not your job as a parent to make your child happy. No one is happy all the time nor should they be, so let go of that idea.

  • You need to start teaching your child about their feelings before they are swept up in a feeling. A case in point, teaching your child about anger during a tantrum is not going to work very well.
  • Give your children the names of the feelings. Google real people feeling angry or happy or frustrated and see what happens on their face. You can even draw these faces onto a page and keep it on the fridge to reference later.
  • Help them understand that you are not your feelings. You can feel angry. It does not mean you are an angry boy. Keep your child’s identity positive but let their feelings change. You can be a good girl who feels lonely. You are not a lonely little girl.
  • Look for opportunities to speak about how others feel. During a walk if you see a boy on his bike you can ask ‘why do you think that little boy is smiling?’ It is easier for kids to see feelings in others before they figure out their own feelings.
  • Show your child that you have feelings too. Talk about your feelings. Your job is not to appear perfect but to show your child how to deal with difficult situations.  By teaching what to do with a feeling it makes each one feel less overwhelming for kids, who are not great at making decisions, especially when feeling emotional.

Teach your child that feelings are catchy. Grumpiness is contagious as is joy. Talk about what you can do with feelings. Being able to recognize and name a feeling is the beginning. Figuring out what to do with the feeling is equally important. Let your kid know what is acceptable behaviour in your home.

For parenting guidance, assistance is a phone call away by reaching out to the LifeAssist National Support centre.