February Newsletter

Loving Advice for a Healthier Relationship

In a marriage or a long-term romantic relationship, it can be all too easy to get complacent and fall into bad habits. This could leave you and your partner feeling frustrated and wondering what happened to that original spark between you.

When the going gets tough, it might feel easier to give up on the relationship than to slog through the hard work of repairing what went wrong. But those who are happily married will tell you that the work is all worth it in the end.

If you feel like your relationship is in dire need of some TLC, don’t expect your spouse to read your mind. Sit down together and talk about where you are in your relationship, and where you want to be. Be kind but honest about your feelings. Then you can start taking some steps towards a healthier, happier relationship.

First, decide together that you both want a fresh start, and that you’re both committed to making the changes your relationship needs.
Forgive old wrongs from the past, and agree not to bring them up in future arguments.
Agree to a new set of standards and expectations. For example, is there something you specifically want your partner to stop doing, or start doing? Do you want to rekindle an old tradition like date night, or start a new one like family night?
Spend quality time together and make these new standards a priority. You might even want to take a short trip together, as a way of clearing your heads and starting anew.
Communicate, communicate, communicate! Check in regularly with each other, review your agreed-upon set of standards and make sure you’re each holding up your end of the bargain.
Show your appreciation. Thank your partner sincerely when you’re grateful for something they’ve done, and be specific about what you’re grateful for. This positive reinforcement can be a big motivation for them to keep up those positive behaviours.
Be prepared to apologise, and admit when you get things wrong. This can be hard to do, but it makes maintaining a healthy relationship so much easier.
If these positive changes don’t start to improve your relationship, getting professional help can make all the difference. Talk to a marriage counsellor or couples’ therapist who can give you the tools to talk through your concerns and work out your differences.

Sources

Relationship Dating Advice
Retrieved from http://www.relationshipdatingadvice.com

A New Beginning
Retrieved from http://www.savemymarriage.com

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Consumer Tip

Financial stress can take a terrible toll on relationships – in fact, money is the issue that couples argue about the most, and a huge percentage of divorces result from financial troubles.

To improve the financial health of your relationship, plan your short-term and long-term financial goals as a couple. Draw up a budget together and update it regularly; once a month at least. This is an empowering exercise that will help both partners to stay equally involved.

Keep your own separate bank accounts, as well as a joint account. This means you have some money of your own to spend or save independently, while pooling the rest of your money together to cover major living expenses.

Lastly, remember that money is just a tool at the end of the day. It reflects what you can afford, but it’s not a reflection of who you are as a person!

Caring Families

“The purpose of a relationship is not to have another who might complete you, but to have another with whom you might share your completeness.”

– Neale Donald Walsch, American author and screenwriter

These are great words for you (and your partner) to live by! Make sure you take care of yourself and cultivate an all-round healthy and happy life, rather than waiting for the right person to come along and do it for you.