Online dating can be loads of fun – if you know the risks involved and stay safe!
Online dating scene
Millions of singles join and log on to online dating sites each day, in the hope of finding love and companionship. Many do find their “significant other” but, unfortunately, quite a few (mostly women) are also scammed out of money, property and even their lives.
Online dating can, however, be fun and fulfilling if you stick to reputable sites, protect your personal information, spot the tell-tale signs of scammers early and keep your wits about you.
Recognise the common dangers
Two of the main risks of online dating are scammers bent on relieving you of your money and property, and information and identity thieves.
Lower your risk by being alert to the following:
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- Those who only give out limited or conflicting information about themselves, for example a man who won’t give you his full name and phone number or who gets his own life story confused. Pay for a background check if you become suspicious.
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- Those who claim to be academically qualified but can hardly write and properly spell words. Some scammers do the opposite and may copy and paste from letters on the Internet, often out of context.
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- Those who start talking money, asking for loans or other so-called emergency funds. Excuses may range from transport money to reach you for your first offline date, money for an operation or other medical emergency or because they have been robbed, etc. A South African woman recently parted with R120 000, to help a supposed artist from London, who claimed he was robbed, to release the container at the docks with his supposed art works. When she flew to Cape Town to meet him he was long gone.
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- Those who move too quickly and try to force you into a whirlwind romance may have ulterior motives. They may try to quickly move your conversations to an email or messaging service outside the safe online dating site. Create a dedicated email account that you use solely for online dating if you must, but be careful!
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- Those who attempt to harvest personal details such as your address, phone number and more in order to steal your identity or sensitive personal information. Protect your personal information by using strong passwords and aliases or nicknames on your profile. Also beware of clicking on links in emails or messages; you may be downloading malware that records your sensitive information. And, keep your security software updated.
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- Those who want to meet you alone and in out of the way destinations for a first (or later) date. Stick to well-lit, public places and let someone phone you half way into the date so that you can make a quick escape if need be.
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- Those who offer to pick you up for your first date. Arrive and leave in your own car or have someone you trust pick you up.
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- Those who are just too good to be true; too good-looking, too talented, too rich, too opinionated, etc. Scammers often copy and use celebrities’ photos and info on their profiles.
Another good rule of thumb is to rather abstain from Internet dating if you are emotionally vulnerable or have just gone through a traumatic break-up or other upsetting experience. Scammers are unusually adept at hoodwinking sensitive, vulnerable people. Wait until you feel more grounded and can think straight again.
Sources
Boatman, K. The dangers of Internet dating. Retrieved from: http://cybercrimenews.norton.com/eye_fi/feature/emerging_threats/internet_dating_dangers/index.html
Etheridge, J. Online dating dangers: four South Africans share their costly encounters. Retrieved from: http://www.biznews.com/undictated/2015/06/11/online-dating-dangers-four-south-africans-share-their-costly-encounters/
Falzone, D. 2016. Risky business: the dangers of online dating and how to protect yourself. http://www.foxnews.com/health/2016/04/12/risky-business-dangers-online-dating-and-how-to-protect-yourself.html