Those seemingly alien beings walking round your house and stalking the fridge really are your little darlings − they have merely turned into teenagers. As they morph into adults, here are some ways you can help them steer the teenage years while keeping your own sanity.

 

Don’t tell them what to do
In most cases a teenager who comes to a parent with a problem merely wants the parent to listen and provide moral support. Teenagers generally don’t look to their parents for solutions to their problems. Simply listen and keep your opinion to yourself, unless you are asked for it.

 

Make time for them
Whether it is sharing a meal at a restaurant once a week, enjoying a movie together or having breakfast together every morning, be available for your teen. Having regular shared time and doing fun things together build trust and confidence and facilitate better communication.

 

Set some rules and boundaries
Especially where it concerns aspects of your teen’s life that cause you to feel nervous, establish rules and boundaries as well as consequences for overstepping the line. Have rules for aspects such as dating, driving, curfews and possibly drinking, and be clear on the privileges teenagers lose if they do not respect these rules.

 

Teach them to cope with everyday challenges
Teenagers should start taking responsibility for at least some of their needs. By the time they finish matric they should be able to do their own shopping, put together a meal, clean their living environment, take care of their laundry and work within a budget. These important life skills are best learnt at home.

 

Respect their interests
Even if your passions are not shared or you do not understand their interests, hobbies or the way they like to dress, show them that you at least respect it. Teenagers take any form of criticism very personally – criticising their choices or interests is criticising them. Give your teenagers the freedom to explore different things, and let them know they do so with your approval.

 

Sources
life.familyeducation.com
www.drphil.com
www.ivillage.co.uk
www.oneplace.com